Hook-up culture, done right, can allow you to explore new parts of yourself – figure out what you’re comfortable with, what you like and what you don’t, the limits are endless.

Written by Joanne Hamilton

Disgraceful Contributor

Six months ago, I found myself questioning everything. Twenty-one years old – single, for the first time in two years. The words self-discovery kept echoing through my mind, my

Grandmother’s advice, ‘Sow your wild oats’ taking centre stage. So, I began to sow them.

If you’re single, or have been at any point over the last five years, you should be very familiar with the divisive dilemma of ‘Hook-Up Culture’. Where people who are (hopefully) in non-committal situations engage in casual sex as a method of self-exploration. Apps like

Hinge and Tinder have been at the forefront of single life – it may be increasingly possible to find a stable relationship, but the opportunities for a sneaky link are endless.

So we know it’s prevalent, but what’s the judgement? Perhaps it’s a useful tool in embracing female sexuality, or perhaps, it’s another method for patriarchal oppression.

It’s nothing new – casual sex has been an ongoing phenomenon for longer than I can safely say, and women have used sexual exploration as a tool for freedom for decades. Times have changed since the sexual revolution – we’re more knowledgeable, and there are more options for safety, but the stigma remains the same. Men are celebrated, or – more often than not – their habits aren’t discussed. And if you’re a woman? Your shameful sex life will probably be the topic of the next office party. Ah, and the body count! How else can they brand you? The stigma extends beyond strangers and mere acquaintances all the way through to well-meaning friends. Are you happy sleeping around? No clue, but would you ask the same if I was settling down?

Not to mention the self-doubt. If I, as a feminist, partake in hook-up culture – often giving my body to someone who could not care less about it – does it diminish what I believe in? Is it hypocritical to present myself as a sexual object, despite supporting a movement that fights so hard to make sure I’m seen as more? Neglecting to remember that a pivotal idea within feminism is that your body is your own, and you’re free to do with it as you wish. Hook-up culture, done right, can allow you to explore new parts of yourself – figure out what you’re comfortable with, what you like and what you don’t, the limits are endless.

In my far-from-expert opinion, as someone who has been exploring casual sex for barely half a year, there is only one thing I can say: as a woman, whether you choose to sleep around, commit, or choose abstinence, there will always be someone with something to say. My verdict: do you.